Lately I am so filled with pride for my boys...I have always heard that teenagers are awful. From the time my boys were born I can recall hearing countless times..."just wait until they are teenagers" like it was some kind of threat or something. And knowing the type of teenager that I was, I took these threats very seriously. I was totally prepared for the worst...(or at least I thought so).
You know what? They were all wrong.... I'm so glad...I'm also glad that I am not sure who "they" were. These teenage years have been some of the best years of my motherhood. When you have teenagers you can actually talk with them. Listen to them..Dream with them...Now I'm not saying that everything was absolutely perfect. There were definitely days, even weeks that were rough. But overall I think I'll take a teenager (teenage boy that is) over a three year old most days.
So I'm so very proud lately of both of them...Mark is taking his National Guard entrance test right now. It's such a tough thing as a mom to encourage your son to go do something difficult, to send him off. Yet I know that God has a plan for him and I firmly believe that I would be doing a big disservice to Mark if I wasn't pushing him....but wow is it tough. I want to cry. I want to hold him tight and not let him go. I want him to stay my baby Marky forever...I am so grateful to have the Lord to lean on during this time. I know that this is what He expects of me too. I feel as though I'm helping Mark get those wings that he needs to fly...and of all the years and trials of raising a boy on my own (for the most part) this has been the most difficult part. Letting them go is the hardest part of being a mom by far...
But after you let them go it is so awesome to watch them grow into the young men that they are meant to be. I had to let Luke go a couple years earlier...definitely earlier than I wanted or had anticipated...But what a young man he is becoming too. I'm so proud of him as well. On Sunday he won FIRST place in the JV wrestling tournament...I can't even describe the amount of pride I have watching him win! The ironic thing is when he was a little boy and first started wrestling, I HATED IT! I hated watching my baby get twisted up, pushed around and pinned to the ground. I hated watching him cry because he was hurt and so mad. But oh how times have changed!! Now I get an adrenaline rush watching him wrestle and screaming for him to win.
Oh how I love them both so much! I pray that the Lord guides them as they are turning into men... and that they listen to his whispers of where He wants them to go.
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